Working Out is Easier Than Asking For Help

My mother once defined my personality as an "intro/extrovert", someone who spent a lot of time comfortably by herself doing solitary things but who could strike up an animated conversation with the right people. Things haven't changed much in the 40+ years since my mom made that observation.

I want to up my bench press weight. What's holding me back is needing to ask someone for a spot. There are enough regulars that I know who I don't want to ask. I'm thinking of asking M, B's friend. I am worried that she'll be upset about it, but not that worried. She'll get over it. What I'm worried about is perhaps he'll say no. A fear of rejection! I'm afraid that The Mayor will trip over himself to assist. And then he'll never stop talking. Sigh. I can see myself just walking away in mid-sentence....

I'm so comfortable in my focused, introverted workout world that it's hard to step out of it, even for a moment. Today I pushed myself to actually wave a brief Hi to the Fish Guy as I'm resting between sets at the Smith, because it seemed odd not to considering that we had a conversation yesterday at the Fish Counter about the freshness of the flounder filets on sale. He seemed pleased as he smiled a brief Hi back. It took me several months to introduce myself to R and that was only because he has these beautiful tattoos that are a natural conversation starter. Asking M for help is going to be harder. I hate asking for help.

Today's Total Workout:
35 min = 4.0 miles Whew!
Smith Bench Press: 12 @ bar / 25 @ 95 / 12 @ 115 / 12 @ 135 / 12 @ 145 / 12 @ 125 / 25 @ 105 lbs Yep, I only did one set at 145 lbs but it was a full 12 repetition set. And I'm suppose to meet my husband at kickboxing tonight so I didn't want to burn myself out just yet.
Cage Stretch & Kicks
The Mayor and friend are using the cable station adjacent to the Cage so I can't do any real kicks
Seated Inclined Rear DB Raises: 6 x 15 @ 25 lbs
Standing Lateral DB Raises: 6 x 12 @ 20 lbs
One-Arm Tricep Extensions: 3 x 12 @ 20 lbs
Flat Bench Twisting Sit Ups: 125
Lower Ab Kick Outs: 100
Torso Twist Machine: 2 x 25 @ 50 lbs
Close-Grip Benching: 4 x 25 @ bar (45 lbs)
I haven't done these in a long time but I'm not happy with how the French Press makes my elbows feel. I save the Tricep Press Downs for Mondays when my arms aren't quite so sore but occasionally I'll muscle through soreness, hence doing what amounts to 100 reps for this movement. 
Mat Stretch

The locker room is loud with cackling and clucking. It's why I don't take classes or engage much in conversation. The noise level is deafening. I keep my headphones on even though my iPod is off to muffle the din. The scale reads 108.4 lbs. A tad heavier than yesterday but not alarming.

I have time to go home, toss my stinky clothes in the washer before I head off to the mammogram and ultrasound. It's a beautiful day outside -- just perfect weather for all the road work to begin as I note orange cones and Men At Work signs dotting every thoroughfare. The medical technicians are pleasant and briskly efficient. It's not nearly as painful as last time when the tech tried to stuff most of my chest between the two glass plates. The ultrasound looks normal as well.

Giving it some thought, I know that I'm hard to approach. I'll walk around people I know because it hasn't registered with me that they're people I know, just obstacles not to bump into. Making eye contact is an invitation to chat, so I rarely do that. It's something I learned while growing up in NYC, traveling on public transportation, and walking down questionable streets in questionable neighborhoods. It's something I've never quite unlearned.

I've joined a couple of online forums looking for advice on how to lift heavier, albeit with caveats (joint issues, etc). So far I'm amused by the fact that my post has been viewed several times but no one has been able to offer any suggestions. I reread my posted routine and think, well, it's not that intimidating, is it? Working out is easy. Asking for help is hard.