Stubbornly AMA

More than 1/2 size longer!

New boots flanked by originals

I skipped the gym yesterday and attempted to get some reading done, but actually just took my son shopping for pants. He's at that hard-to-fit age/size: too big for boys XL, but too small to wear men's Sm. Ugh. I had also ordered some black short boots for him (for school next term) from Zappos, but they arrived too narrow and too long. The description of the Rockports said 8.5 EE but a side-by-side comparison of those shoes with his current (beat-to-hell and probably won't survive the summer) LL Bean 8W boots shows the older boots are wider. The same happened with the shiny new black Ariat Fatbaby boots I ordered. I sent both pairs of boots back via UPS yesterday morning. Hours later, I got an email from Zapppos telling me they'd received my returns and had credited me the total amount. Wow, I'm impressed! That was so fast, it was almost instantaneous! I can get used to instant gratification, but I probably shouldn't.

AMA is an acronym for Against Medical Advice. I'm good at following rules, but only so I can figure out how to get around them. (My parents were right; I should've been a lawyer.) I'm always really grumpy when I go to the gym. I can feel myself growling inside, like I want to bit the head off of someone. While I pedal the recumbent bike, I decide to google the recovery time for cataract and glaucoma surgeries, specifically, when I can return to my normal exercise routine. Contrary to what my doc's been telling me, online resources state that mild exercise like stationery bikes, stairs, treadmills and ellipticals should be encouraged. More strenuous exercises like weight lifting and jumping can occur after one week. Huh?!

I know my surgery took longer than normal because I have such small eyeballs. I know that my doc is just being cautious to get a good outcome from the surgery. And I hate arguing with my doctors, but I have been known to do just that. I can be a difficult patient because I do my own research, and docs usually hate that. Because it questions their authority as medical professionals. But a good doctor will address patient concerns, no matter where they originated, especially if they're valid. Most of my doc's patients (that I see in the waiting room) are elderly, and not in great physical condition. It's nothing for them to not do anything strenuous because I don't think it's something they normally do. I'm different. Yes, I'm guilty of that "the rules don't apply to me" sort of thinking. But I'm not impulsive or rash either.

So, AMA, I'm doing more than just walking on the treadmill. Because I don't see the point. My shoulders and back have started to develop knots from sitting at the computer and reading all day. Ugh. I'm missing getting hot and sweaty, and limber. I'm having trouble sleeping. All these things are solved with vigorous exercise. I figure I'd add the kickboxing back in last since that involves impact. I don't mind not lifting if I can get the body weight exercises done, specifically pull ups, push ups and core work, if I can do Intervals and other HIIT routines. (I tried on some of my old shorts and the waist is feeling uncomfortably tight! Aaarg!)

I feel my dour mood melt away the harder I pedal the recumbent bike. I get on the treadmill, and against the doctor's orders, I raise the incline to 5%. I'm still just walking fast at speed 3, but not so fast that I can't sing along (just barely) to my tunes. Little beads of perspiration well up on my forehead. I feel better. The screen, which I capture with my phone, gives me stats. For the last 5 minutes I hold the handles where the heart rate monitors are embedded. The stats include a heart rate of 128, which, according to all the heart rate gurus, is 79% of my max heart rate. That seems suspiciously low. I'm not even vaguely winded. Apparently, I'm suppose to take the number 220 (I'm not sure what this number is suppose to mean) and minus my age to get my max heart rate. So no matter who you are, the older you get, the lower your max heart rate. Mine calculates to be 162.

Am I killing myself by "running" on the elliptical and my heart rate jumps up to 155-159? Websites affiliated with The Mayor Clinic and LiveStrong state that studies show people die from cardiac problems when sustaining max heart rates for long periods of time. However, at least LiveStrong presents an alternative formula for max heart rate: 208 minus 70% age, which gives me 208 minus (0.7 x 58 = 40.6) equals 167.4. It's a few points higher. That give me 30 minutes on the treadmill at 76% of my max heart rate. It still doesn't feel like much of a workout. Seriously.

I get on the Step Mill for 15 minutes. Level 3 feels like riding a department store escalator. I keep boredom at bay by changing my footwork a minute at a time. Side step. Other side. Rock up at the edge of the step. Step across with each ascending leg. The only thing I don't do is walk backwards up the stairs because I don't feel coordinated enough. And I'm too short to hold the handles in that position. My heart rate registers 135 which is 80% of 167.4. This feels closer to a real workout. I'm actually sweating doing this slow-motion Chaplin routine!

front of a Life Is Good T-shirt

I stretch out at the Cage. To prevent me from giving in to the temptation to do a pull up, I've consciously left my lifting gloves back in my gym bag, in the locker. I do all of the Mat Stretch today. And I'm so tempted to do Bird Dogs and Side Planks that I actually type them into my phone before thinking the better of it. I can start doing them tomorrow. Yes, I plan to ease back into my routine with the least stressful moves. I might hold off on push ups and pull ups until next Wednesday, when it'll have been 3 weeks. I'll also have my son with me because school is over tomorrow, and he's told me I can be his personal trainer. There's no one else I'd rather help anyway.

Grumpy Thursday Summer Solstice

15 Recumbent Bike + 3cd
Level 1 Manual
Calories 81
Miles 2.76

30 Treadmill
5% Incline
Speed 3
Ft Climbed 385
Miles 1.47
Calories 188

15 StepMill
Speed 3
Total steps 542
Floors 33
Calories 85
Heart Rate 135

Try and Try Again

I admit that I look like some weird sort of hospital pirate when I affixed tape over the super large water proof patch atop my left eye. I haven't been to the CVS yet to see if they have eye patches for kids with lazy eye. The tape and band-aid does a reasonable job of protecting the eye, but I still feel water leak in while I shower. Ugh. Try and try again.

Of course, I probably should've worn goggles this morning when I went out with the hedge clippers to snip back low-hanging vines from our hedges. There's been so much rain that the whole area has literally exploded in jungle-like greenery. It wasn't actually raining, but there was enough water on all the foliage that made the likelihood of being splashed in the face a good possibility. Especially since I was under the overhanging vines and branches, and reaching up to snip them off. It was also still really hot, and humid. Goggles, like my sunglasses, tend to fog up and be rendered useless when I get over-heated.

I did a bevy of cardio machines and eventually broke a light sweat. I didn't incline the treadmill but gradually increased the speed every few minutes until I was back up to 3, which is still walking. Just not strolling. Besides the recumbent bike and the step mill, I also stretched out on the mat, and did a partial routine, or anything that didn't have me putting my head down. After showering and changing, I head to my car because I have my annual Ob/Gyn appointment. As I'm walking, I hear The Mayor and his bud SquareJaw. The Mayor is even louder outside the gym, which surprises me. Worse, the only part I hear is (and perhaps I mis-heard, but probably not) him saying "...that fucking broad..." I'm not shocked by expletives. I'm not a prude. But I haven't heard anyone call anyone "a broad" except maybe in old movies. Which makes me more certain than ever that he's someone to avoid.

Now, of course, I'm wondering if I can do some DBs as long as they're under 20 lbs total weight. Yes, always looking for a way around this "strenuous exercise ban"... I know it's temporary, but 4-6 weeks is a really long time. It's most of the summer. Ugh.

Looks totally normal Day 14

Boring Tuesday

15 Recumbent Bike + 3 cd
Level 1 Manual
Calories 79
Miles 2.61

30 treadmill
No Incline
Speed 3.0
Calories 113
Miles 1.41

15 Step Mill
Speed 3
Total steps 558
Floors 34
Calories 87
Average Heart Rate 125

Cardio Cure for the Blahs

Having 6 different eye drops to administer requires time management and organizational skills that start to lapse as the day wears on. I went to bed much too late last night. Consequently, I had a dull headache this morning and found myself to be less than enthusiastic about hitting the gym. Plus, it was downright cold at 50F (I packed a flannel shirt to change into once I was done).

My eye looks loads better, with just a fraction of redness. But it still aches a bit and itches after I do my drops. Worse, it's difficult to clean all the sleepies out of your face if you can't splash water on it. The clear eye shield leaves edge indents on my skin no matter how lightly I tape it to my face. I'll be glad when I don't have to do this every night.

I'm tired and depressed when I get to the gym. I'm wearing a different green shirt though. As I pedal the recumbent bike, I can feel my mood lifting. I'm trying to pedal as fast as I can without exerting myself. I even manage to get warm enough to unzip my hoodie. On the treadmill, I decide to increase the speed and level angle until I'm just at the edge of being breathless. I'm definitely busting a sweat now, but it feels good and makes me happy. I'm light and bouncy, and mouth all the lyrics to my iPod tunes. With the body of the machine angled up 12° I'm able to comfortably grab the end of the handles (heart rate sensors) for a few minutes. That's just enough time for the machine to register it. My hands will fall asleep being raised to face height for extended lengths of time!

White orb on lower right is glare
from the overhead lights!

Under normal circumstances I would stretch and do a bunch of pull ups and then push ups. But I can't just yet. It's been 10 days and I'm not suppose to exert myself for at least two weeks and maybe longer. Ugh. I can't resist stretching in the Cage, but at one point I forget my caution and pull myself up slightly while inside. Knots in my upper back and shoulders feel better when stretched out with a bit of body weight. But I instantly regret my foray because my eyeballs ache a little. It could just be the "lack of sleep" headache I woke up with, or it could be eyeball pressures. I don't know and I really shouldn't be risking a great outcome for this surgery by doing something stupid, like pull ups. Ugh.

I get on the Step Mill for 10 minutes and only go to Level 3. I'm so used to doing the fast-paced Level 6 that I almost don't know what to do with myself. But climbing stairs will definitely raise your heart rate! I see mine shoot from 125 to 140. And I'm warm enough to be sweaty. I get off the Step Mill and do a few leg and hip stretches, then a few shoulder rotations. For each move,  I have to assess whether there's a face-down component. Bending down increases optic pressures so my stretches are extremely limited. But still, better than nothing.

In the locker room, I tape my eye shut, but I'm still not happy with my fear of shower water infiltrating my closed eye. I also need to spend time exfoliating since having icthylosis vulgaris means going more than a week becomes unpleasant and somewhat embarrassing, with all the dry flaky scaly skin not quite peeling off... there's only so much that an alpha-hydroxy cream like Amlactin® will cure with a mere application. (When I get to the grocery store, I buy a few waterproof band-aids to see if those will work better in the future.) I hold my breath when I get on the gym scale. Inexplicably, it reads 109.0 lbs. So weird and unexpected since I'm eating normally. All I can think is that I'm losing all my muscles and getting fat, because I weigh less but my clothes fit the same. Ugh!

I have a follow-up appointment with my glaucoma doc on Monday. My vision has returned to normal in the operated eye. But I wonder about my eye drops, because the antibiotic label says it's a 2.5 mL bottle and I can refill 2.5 times. What? Is the pharmacist going to dispense a half bottle? The accompanying anti-inflammatory is in a 5 mL bottle and I can refill it 5 times. I need to administer both these medications 1 drop 4 times a day. This is a bit baffling. Ugh.

I'm not ready to do my right eye. Not yet. I'm still sporadically queasy and my eye itches like I've got allergies. Sometimes it waters for no apparent reason. Weirder still, when I viewed the treadmill screen today, the left eye gave me a normal image, but the right eye had bizarre glare distortions. I'll have to mention this to my doc 'cuz it's definitely weird.


Bored Out of My Mind Friday Workout

15 min recumbent bike + 3 cd
Level 1 Manual
Calories 81
Miles 2.78

30 min treadmill
Speed 2.9
Incline 10 – 12%
Calories 246
Miles 1.33
731 ft climbed
Average Heart Rate 128

Cage Stretch (uh oh!)

10 min StepMill
Level 3
Steps 356
Floors 22
Calories 56
Average Heart Rate 140