When Your Head Gets the Best of You

XS clothes
seem billowy

I think I'm still tired from Saturday's play date. Actually, it's probably the combination of missing Friday's cardio/leg day workout, and having company on Saturday. I'm as sociable as the next person, but sometimes I find social interplay to be more exhausting than actual physical exercise. I don't talk to a lot of people on a regular basis so perhaps I'm just out of practice?

I'm also re-thinking the 10 minute warm up because it's not enough. Perhaps it's because I'm 55, but I need at least 15 min or more to feel warmed up. Today I do 10 min, a brief stretch and then discover that B and her friend are doing Smith Squats. They spend a lot of time between sets just chatting. I see B chatting up Tattoo Tank. I almost didn't recognize him because his hair is so short. After they're done, someone else hops into the Smith rack. I decide to bite the bullet and do my benching on the breaker bench. I hate this bench. It's too wide, and too tall. There are three of them and most of them stick when you pull the bar forward, necessitating a quick push back with your loaded bar to get the stays out of the way.

I grab two yoga blocks to put on the floor so I can position my feet flat. But it's not the same as having your feet flat on the ground. I do sets of 12. Until I get to 110 lbs. It's really not that heavy. But I get nervous and only do 4 reps. And then another 2 reps. I feel like I'm getting weaker! I drop the bar down to 90 lbs and knock out 15 reps. Then another 12 reps. I used to be able to knock out 20 reps after going heavy. My right shoulder feels a bit funky, but it doesn't really hurt. Yet. I'm disappointed in myself. It wasn't that long ago that I could get a few reps at 135 lbs. But of course, my right shoulder always hurt after that. I'll try again next week. Maybe going back to 15 min cardio warm up, and less sets before hitting the heavier weights. Like I used to do. We'll see if it's in my head, or if maybe age is really catching up to me.

I don't see age when I move to DB Lateral Raises superset with DB Revere Inclined Flyes. Or with the Rip Skullcrushers. Or the CGBP I do for reps. Maybe I'm warmed up now? I do confess to feeling fatigue and some anxiety when I go back to the cardio platform. Today I take it easy and break my HIIT into two segments, interspersed with 5 min of LISS. For the last minute, I'm amused to watch the mileage tick away in pace with the calorie counter. Yes, I'm easily amused.

I've been thinking a lot about aging lately, looking in the mirror and wondering how upset I'm going to be when I actually start to look saggy and old. I can already see it in my face. Sometimes I find my dad's face staring back at me from the bathroom mirror. That's a bit unnerving! My son and I watched the original 1950, B&W Sunset Boulevard on DVD yesterday, and I empathized with Norma Desmond wanting to look forever 25, and not 50. Although, I thought she looked dang good for 50!

Worse, I've been wondering about aging and health. I know I'm doing everything I can to stay healthy and live a long active life. And then I see my in-laws, both ensconced in different care facilities in Florida, the state geriatric bureaucracy sucking away all their funds. My sister-in-law with her own family medical issues, watching helplessly while trying to intercede on her parents' behalf. It's depressing. But is it inevitable? Yesterday I read about a study purported to show that preventing inflammation was critical to precluding age-related ailments. Not muscle soreness inflammation, but the more subtle inflammation that occurs when you don't eat properly, suffer from too much stress, don't exercise enough. I take fish oil daily just for its anti-inflammatory effects.

Tomorrow I'll probably feel better because it's Core and Cardio Day. And Cardio always cheers me up and makes me feel like a human being again. Plus, we're going to see Shaun the Sheep! Sheep make everyone happy!

Monday Workout
(3.5 miles cardio; 20, 950 lbs moved)

Cross Trainer

Warm Up

Calorie :   47 CAL
Distance: 1.31 mile
Speed :    7.79 mph
Duration : 00:10:06

Barbell Bench Press

Set 1 : 45x20
Set 2 : 65x12
Set 3 : 85x12
Set 4 : 95x12
Set 5 : 115x4
Set 6 : 115x2 Booo!
Set 7 : 95x15
Set 8 : 95x12

Barbell Incline Bench Press

Set 1 : 30x15
Set 2 : 70x12
Set 3 : 90x8
Set 4 : 90x8
Set 5 : 90x8

Dumbbell Lateral Raise

Set 1 : 20x12
Set 2 : 20x12
Set 3 : 25x8
Set 4 : 25x12
Set 5 : 25x12
Set 6 : 20x15 SuperSet with

Dumbbell Reverse Flyes

Set 1 : 20x15
Set 2 : 20x15
Set 3 : 25x12
Set 4 : 25x15
Set 5 : 25x15
Set 6 : 25x15

Barbell Reverse Grip Skullcrusher

Set 1 : 30x12
Set 2 : 40x12
Set 3 : 40x12
Set 4 : 40x12

Barbell Close Grip Bench Press

Set 1 : 45x25
Set 2 : 65x25
Set 3 : 45x50

Elliptical Training

Calorie :   219 CAL
Distance: 2.19 mile
5 min HIIT, 5 min LISS
5 min HIIT, 15 min LISS
Duration : 00:30:00

Making Peace with 55

Every time I look in the mirror, I notice something else awry... a slight discoloration, a bump, a crease that wasn't there yesterday. I guess that's how time sneaks up on you. I'm starting to use more moisturizer on my skin lately to forestall the inevitable deterioration. I'm still not sure whether to stick with my cardio program as is, or to change my weight program because I'm not getting the results I'd like. Of course, I'm not sure it's possible to get what I want either. Maybe I should just be happy with being stronger and not enormously fat?

The MyFitnessPal is good for checking whether I've gotten enough calcium during the day. I do wish it was programmable so I could customize it better. That's probably possible in the deluxe version. I just have the free app. I have been struggling to eat enough protein and I'm not entirely happy with that. I'm definitely big today. Half of it is water retention because we ate seafood for dinner: sauteed vongoles in garlic and wine sauce, fried clam strips and a green salad. Boiled ham and cheddar on ciabatta bread for lunch. And then, while watching the season premiere of Game of Thrones, we snacked on blue stilton cheese and crackers. My clothes feel tight. My legs and butt are still sore from Friday's Smith Split Squats. And in spite of all this, I still had a great workout, defined by my ability to get three sets of 8 reps at my current max weight of 130 lbs. I probably could've gotten more reps, but I always end with a set of 25 reps at lighter weight, just for the pump.

I only do a few sets of Smith Inclined Benching. My elbow and shoulders felt great during Flat benching, but less so at the incline. As soon as I vacate the Smith, Venus and Flirty Girl take turns doing Smith Squats. I'd seen Venus earlier at the Squat rack with Chatty Guy. They had walked in together. Maybe they are an item? She had a big plate on each end of an Oly and he was spotting. But I find that most women, like myself, are more comfortable squatting at the Smith.

My finger is intermittently painful and still wrapped in self-adhering closed-cell foam. After two warm up sets of DB Laterals and DB Reverse Inclined Flyes, I up the weights and drop the reps. Frankenstein lumbers over to the DBs and plants himself right in front of the rack while he alternately curls and does lateral raises. He's a big balding, older man with a bad hip replacement (one shoe is nearly an inch thicker in the sole) who moves slowly and carelessly. Half the middle-age men at my gym seem to be completely clueless as to what they're doing or why they're even here. Eventually he reracks his DBs but nothing is in the right place. Figures.

I do some reps on the Torso Twist machine before another 30 minutes on the elliptical. I know I'm slower today and my total mileage shows it. I'm not ready to stretch yet so I go back to the DB area and do a few DB Presses, and then a few DB Flyes. The presses feel okay. The flyes not so much. Even with a mere 20 lbs (each), I feel a peculiar discomfort in my right armpit. Identifying the issue is puzzling... not pectoral, not bicep, feels more like rear delt? Very odd.

I don't let that stop me from Dive Bomber Push Ups and a brief plank at the Mat. Splits always feel victorious and I'm happy that they're all so easy today. But time is flying and I have things to do... The scale is not my friend today. Maybe by the end of the week. Or maybe I'll just have to get used to being bigger, heavier, and give up my candy-colored summer shorts and pants. Sigh.

Monday Cardio and Workout
(6.59 miles total; 18,730 lbs moved)

Elliptical Training

Calorie :   146 CAL
Distance: 3.72 mile
Speed :    7.4 mph
Duration : 00:30:10

Smith Machine Bench Press

165

Set 1 : 30x12
Set 2 : 80x12
Set 3 : 120x10
Set 4 : 130x8
Set 5 : 130x8
Set 6 : 130x8
Set 7 : 90x25

Smith Machine Incline Bench Press

126

Set 1 : 30x12
Set 2 : 70x12
Set 3 : 80x12
Set 4 : 90x12

Dumbbell Lateral Raise

31.67

Set 1 : 20x12
Set 2 : 20x12
Set 3 : 25x8
Set 4 : 25x8
Set 5 : 25x8
Set 6 : 20x12 SuperSet with

DB Reverse Flyes

35

Set 1 : 20x15
Set 2 : 20x15
Set 3 : 25x12
Set 4 : 25x12
Set 5 : 25x12
Set 6 : 20x15

TorsoTwist

Set 1 : 50x25
Set 2 : 50x25

Elliptical Training

Calorie :   257 CAL
Distance: 2.87 mile
Duration : 00:30:10

Dumbbell Bench Press

56

Set 1 : 30x12
Set 2 : 35x12
Set 3 : 40x12

Dumbbell Fly

28

Set 1 : 20x12
Set 2 : 20x12
Set 3 : 20x12

Plank

Set 1 : 00:01:00

DiveBomberPushup

Set 1 : 20 Lap/Rep
Set 2 : 20 Lap/Rep

Abbreviations Galore

Top: LF treadmill = .64 miles
Bottom: Row = 1.57 miles

I took my son to the gym yesterday. After 20 min on the treadmill and another 20 min rowing on the Concept II erg, he did sets on various Cybex machines, discovered ones he absolutely didn't fit into, did better on Inverse Rows at the Smith machine, as well as basic bench presses with a padded, weighted 20 lb bar in the DB area. Again, he was too tired to do the 3rd round of cardio but managed to squeak out several sets of crunches. Then we took a drive and got a supermarket-cooked chicken for dinner, and gelato just for fun: Italian cheesecake and Peeps for him; raspberry coffee with heath bar crumble for me. Not quite as good as their pistachio, but tasty enough.

Today I'd planned to drop my son off at tae kwon do for a few hours but they were closed when we arrived. I found out when I brought him to my gym that their town's school board completely screwed up their holiday schedule. Whereas we lost days during Winter Break in February (no one's planning to go anywhere anyway), this town took snow days away from Spring Break. So Carmel NY had school today, and Mahopac did not. But Carmel's off the rest of the week. They were going to have the day after Easter as well, but lost that as well. What this means is that I had to bring my son to the childcare room at the gym today and limit myself to a 2-hour workout, which, when you count showering and changing, isn't enough time to do my entire routine. I dropped sets off everything except the Flat Bench because that's the important lift. I managed to squeeze in a Cage Stretch but no additional cardio. I'll just have to make it up the rest of the week.

Today's Abbreviated Monday Workout

20 min Precor = 1.93 miles

Flat BB Bench
12x45 lbs (bar)
10x95 lbs
8x115 lbs (now I'm just starting to feel warmed up)
8x125 lbs
(I had The Mayor spot me here but I can't remember if I did 8 or 10 reps. Bummer. He asked if I was upping the weight and I said, "Just a tad." He says, "You should just toss a 45 on there." But that'd be such a pain to do the drop sets afterwards.)
6x135 lbs +2 reps Yay!
(The Mayor spotted me ^^ here too and was surprised I didn't need a lift off)
10x115 lbs +2 reps
20x95 lbs (for fun)

Inclined BB Press
12x45 lbs (bar)
10x65 lbs
My right shoulder's feeling a little achy so I'm not unhappy cutting my sets way back today
10x85 lbs

Inclined DB Flyes
12x25 lbs
3x12x30 lbs

Standing Lateral DB Raises
12x25 lbs
8, 8, 12 x 30 lbs Couldn't resist upping the reps on the last set

Bent-Over DB Reverse Flyes
12x25 lbs
3x12x30 lbs

I barely have time for a quick Cage Stretch before I change and shower. I'm only 10 minutes late to rescue my son from "baby purgatory". The gym scale reads 113.0 lbs. I'm good with that. The tae kwon do school has called back and offered me a free week of summer camp for the mix-up this morning. That's cool.

Getting My Confidence Back

My son was too tired after kung fu (and an excursion to Hmart) to go to the gym on Saturday. Besides, the next day we'd be marching in the St Pat's parade, carrying our den banner. It's about a 2-mile walk down the main road, the weather sunny and a tad brisk. My son grumbled about his pants chafing his legs, about how boring the march was, about how his hands were tired from holding the banner (nevermind he had two other cubs helping hold it), about how hopelessly landlocked our car would be, about how he wasn't going to get anything special for all this effort. Grumble grumble grumble. Until the march ended at the shopping plaza, and he saw the three llamas parked behind the oil change place, politely snagging carrot slices from outstretched palms. Then he was all smiles, feeding and petting one of the woolly creatures. "No upper teeth, just a hard palate and very flexible lips," their keeper explained to us. But they did have funny irregular bottom teeth, filthy soft fleece and would stand stock-still for a picture if you yelled out "Camera!"

"I need to wash my hands at the pizzeria," my son said to me all smiles. Okay now. The pizza was an exorbitant $2.50 a slice, but each slice was the size of two regular slices so I didn't mind too much. By the time we found our car, the ones parked directly in front and behind us had gone, allowing us to wriggle out from between all the other vehicles still there. It took 30 minutes to leave the lot, but it was just as I had expected, and we didn't really have to be anywhere. I just turned on the radio and rolled down my windows while we inched towards the exit.

Imagine my surprise today when we walked to the school bus stop and there were flurries! At least it's not sticking although my car needs a good wash. The dog's been sick as well and I've been spending a lot of time mopping the kitchen with bleach. Digging around the "dog cabinet" I found an old bottle of Tylan powder, an antibiotic good for canine digestive ailments. The dog's a little better today but I'm worried that this is something a lot worse than the usual "dog ate something spicy but it'll pass and he'll be fine". I look up ruptured anal glands but even though he's scooting a lot, he doesn't have the right symptoms. I make an appointment for him to see the vet next Monday. Hopefully he won't poop in my car. I really hate that.

Today is Chest and Delts and I was nervous about not being able to bench heavy. Luckily, after my 20 minute cardio warm up (steady-state elliptical), I see the woman who helped me out last week. And after my warm up sets, I ask her if she'll spot me even though M, The Mayor, Tall Pace and a bunch of the Regular Guys are closer. But they're all chatting and hanging off the lat and rowing stations. The woman, K, is at first a terrible spot. I need to tell her that I've got the lift myself. I've got the entire set myself. Just help me if I start to fail. She's got her hands nearly under the bar but I still get my sets myself. All three sets. I have my confidence back. Yay! She whispers to me afterwards, "Next time, just add two and a half pounds. You know, a pair of one and a quarter plates." I look at her skeptically, "And why would I do that?" Nevermind that I think the smallest plates are two and a half. "To get stronger," she says and I laugh. "Yeah, okay."

I only have five exercises today: Flat Bench BB Press, Inclined Bench BB Press, Inclined DB flyes, DB Lateral Raises, Bent-Over DB Raises. I'm able to up the weights on three of those exercises so I'm happy. I grab four of the small magnets that are only 1.25 lbs each. The gym owner looks surprised but I tell him that I'm using DBs and don't need to jump 5 lbs, just two and a half. Then I ask him if the Nexersys are fixed and he says mostly. The side Dig sensor is not working but everything else seems okay. I hope it's still okay on Thursday when I plan to whack one of them senseless.

The steps are free and I spend 20 minutes reading email and the online forums while sweat drips off my nose. I make a mental note to do crunches while I'm down on the Mat for stretches. As I get ready to leave, I see R and chat with him briefly about his new baby. He says the baby is so good that he and his wife would gladly have ten of them if they're all like this. I laugh. The baby's getting big and he hopes that his son won't be quite as tall as he is. I'm surprised. "It gets awkward fitting into things," he explains to me. I guess as awkward as being really small.

Chest and Delt Monday Workout

20 min elliptical = 1.97 miles

Flat BB Bench Press
12x45 lbs (bar)
10x95 lbs
8x115 lbs
3x6x125 lbs (Yay! had K spot me but I got them all myself)
20x95 lbs

Inclined BB Press
12x45 lbs (bar)
12x65 lbs
10x85 lbs
6, 7, 8x95 lbs (can probably do more but wanted to save energy for delts)

Inclined DB Flyes
12x20 lbs (warm up)
2x12x25 lbs
12x27.5 lbs (got braver here)
2x12x30 lbs PR Yay! +5 lbs

Standing DB Lateral Raises
12x27.5 lbs (warm up)
4x12x30 lbs (+1 set Yay! trying to work my way up to 6 sets of 12)

Bent-Over DB Reverse Flyes
4x12x30 lbs (got braver after 4th set)
2x12x32.5 lbs (will probably be a while before I attempt 35 lbs)

20:24 min:sec Matrix Step Mill = 910 steps

3x50 crunches
2x12 Dive Bomber Push Ups
60-second plank
Mat Stretch