Tossing Caution to the Wind!

N who is competing

Having our clocks move an hour back over the weekend was a joyously disorienting event. More sleep, and yet, by mid-afternoon, I could've sworn it was late evening already. My husband insisted on burning a picnic pork on Saturday. Well, it wasn't really his fault. He'd bought a new smoker that had caveats, like non-existent temperature (vent) controls. The pork butt incinerated in the middle of the night when the smoldering lumpwood charcoal and sodden apple wood pieces suddenly ignited. The next day he bought another pork shoulder and reverted to the trusty Weber grill to make pulled pork. Needless to say, we ate well all weekend and didn't do much other than household chores. While I was online, I did manage to look up the contest N will be competing in, and I was very surprised to find her biography and glam photo as well. Funny, she looks taller than 5' 6 but perhaps even a mere 6 inches over my head is enough to give the illusion of height. She also looks older than 19 in the photos, but glam hair and makeup will do that. I pulled one of the photos and posted it here just to show you. It's her first contest, but looking at the competition makes me think she needs a lot more muscle. Of course, I'm not sure what the judging criteria is, although there is an evening gown section. Wow, that remind me of Miss America pageants from ages ago.

Today I approached the gym with a mix of trepidation and resignation. I'm getting here a tad late and there's barely any parking left. I do find a spot so close to the gym I'm embarrassed, but at least it's not the handicap spot. I see B chatting with a friend and give a cursory wave. My favorite elliptical is taken so I hop on #3. As I start pedaling, I realize the other reason I dislike this station: it's directly under a vent that blows cold air down on my head and hands. I pull my hands inside my hoodie sleeves until I've warmed up a bit, otherwise the air stings my skin. Today I'm singing to my iPod tunes and it seems to help me maintain some speed although not enough to make my quota. I'm not that bummed, because I'm more concerned about how well I'm going to fare benching.

Benching is probably the only Big Movement that I actually worry about, that I have actually set a goal for. There are three flat benches, two inclined and one declined. Everything is occupied except for the flat bench facing the inclined benches. It's my least favorite because the stays seem a bit twisted and out of alignment from the bench itself. I want to bench heavy today so I only do 12 reps with the bar. Everything else I do 6 reps. I should've probably cut some of my sets but this is how I warm up. When I get to 115 lbs, which I know I can do a full set for, I only do 6 reps. Then I toss on 10 lbs and look around to see who I can ask to spot me. The Mayor has been chatting and moving between the cables and preacher curls over in the DB area. The only other options are Sunshine, and a smaller, paler (think Eastern European white) guy with bad tats on his calves.

The Mayor comes by and I tell him it's the same weight I've been doing for weeks now. I get my five reps plus one with a touch of help. I thank him, and he says I should do another set heavier for just one or two reps. I look at him a bit puzzled. "Don't end this way. Do a few reps at the next heavier weight just to see what it feels like. Toss on a nickel... or two and a halves." I must've had a very skeptical look on my face because he adds, "I'll help you." "Okay, as long as you help me," I tell him. He wanders off to his preacher curls, and I grab a pair of 5s and toss them on. That's 135 lbs. Yep. I'm muttering under my breath about how godawful heavy this is going to be by the time he comes round again. I'm surprised that I can actually get the lift off by myself. I can get one, two reps. I start to sputter a little on the third rep and definitely need a spot of help pushing the last rep. I don't even know if I should claim the last rep, but it's not like he rescued me 'cuz I was pushing it with everything I had. So much so that I could only get 5 reps at the next set which was only 115 lbs. That's proof to me that I really worked this. The Mayor points to the 45 lb plate and says ,"Next time you can do that." I laugh, I've been laughing since the last set, and shake my head a little. "I'm not sure about that." "It's the same weight. You just pushed it," he says. "My head's not prepared for that," I reply but I'm smiling. I finish off benching with 12 reps at 95 lbs. Wow, I feel good. "See, now you're happy," he says as he wanders back to the DB area.

I see a gal I haven't seen in months. She took the summer off because she's a janitorial custodian and spent the summer working, making extra cash. Can't fault her. She's lost something like a hundred pounds over the past two years, and today I see her working out with the other extremely large woman I've only noticed in the past few months. The first gal is working towards losing a few more pounds and then she wants to have skin reduction surgery because a lot of times skin doesn't shrink when your body does. Then she'll donate the skin to a tissue bank to help burn victims who often must rely on cadaver skin. I meet a lot of interesting people. I just don't talk a lot.

Cage Stretch is routine but satisfying. I grab four discs from the front desk and amble back to the DB area. Just delts and abs to do before I'm done. Only two exercises for delts: rear inclined DB flyes and standing lateral DB raises. My shoulders area already tired but I'm determined to do my sets. I see ZZ at the end of the DB area. There are suddenly a lot of regulars floating about. Not so crowded that I'm tripping over people yet. The guy on the adjacent bench is pressing a pair of 110s for 4 to 5 reps. He keeps looking over to see if I'm watching. I think he was the same guy who gave me a lousy spot some weeks ago, but I'm not sure because I haven't really been paying attention. The standing lateral DB raises are really hard at 30 lbs and normally I do sets of 8 reps. But today I want to push it so I grit my teeth and squeeze out 12. Not pretty at all.

Me

All that's left are abs and Mat Stretch. RR is on the sit up bench so I knock out crunches on the ABStation, then the Torso Twist machine, and finally, a hundred reps of "knee-in kick outs" on a forlorn flat bench. During the Mat stretch, I felt my left lower quad suddenly twinge as I drop into a side-lunge so I slow my tempo down. Dive Bomber Push Ups don't feel any easier, and I still hate planks. As I head toward the women's locker room, an older man taps me on the shoulder. I pull out my ear piece, thinking I've dropped something. "What do you do for a living?" I look at him perplexed because that's not the question I was expecting. And why does he want to know anyway? What do I say? I don't really say anything before he says, "I was watching you work out." Uh oh. "Do you know Cirque du Soleil?" Well yeah, doesn't everyone? but I don't say that. I just say, "Uh, yeah." "You could perform with them!" he grins broadly. I'm admittedly surprised, smile oddly and murmur the first thing that comes to my mind, "Oh, no, I'm too old to do that." If I wasn't so socially awkward, I'd've said "Why thank you so much!" with a big smile, but I'm a geeky nerd at heart, so I didn't.


Monday's Workout:
35 min Hill 5 = 3.96 miles (Yawn!)

Bench Press: 12 @ bar (45 lbs) / 6 @ 75 lbs / 6 @ 95 lbs / 6 @ 115 lbs / 5+1 @ 125 / 2+2 @ 135 lbs PR / 5 @ 115 lbs / 12 @ 95 lbs  Not sure how to count the reps if you have a spot "help" you.

Cage Stretch with BW heel dips & calf raises and side kicks

Reverse Inclined DB Flyes: 15 @ 25 lbs / 15 @ 27.5 lbs / 3 x 15 @ 30 lbs
Okay, not sure I'm going to up the weight from here but doing 15 reps is getting a bit crazy

Standing Lateral DB Raises: 12 @ 25 lbs / 12 @ 27.5 lbs / 3 x 12 @ 30 lbs
The last two reps for the last three sets were definitely ugly ugly ugly

Ab Crunch Station: 100
Lower Ab Knee-In Kick Out: 100
Torso Twist Machine: 2 x 25 @ 50 lbs

Mat Stretch: 12 wide-legged DBPUs, 3 rolling, 12 regular-stance DBPUs, splits, upper and lower back stretches... no handstands or flips or back bendovers so nothing Cirque du Soleil worthy I'm afraid.