Unseasonable

It was 16F when I woke up this morning. At least there's very little humidity which means I didn't need to scrape my windshield while warming up the car. Other places have been hit much worse. I've dug out my down parkas (yes, I own several) and assorted gloves. Last night I filled the bird feeder with black oil sunflower seeds so that the chickadees and tufted titmouse (titmice?) will be well-rewarded for their pre-dawn excursions into my yard. The suet, embedded with broken sunflower kernels and peanut pieces, provides calories for the red-bellied woodpecker, nuthatches and any other bird waiting for a chance to nab a big black sunflower seed.

The gym is still being painted. I get on the elliptical and the treadmills in front of me start to fill with bodies. My hands are numb with cold from grasping the metal portion of the handles where the sensors are located. I don't take my hoodie off until halfway through the program because that's how long it takes for me to get my body temperature up. I'm freezing once again in the Aerobic Room but I don't want to wear my hoodie because I use it in place of a towel when I lay down on the communal mats to do crunches and planks.

I don't break a sweat again until halfway through my second cardio set. I do my Smith RDLs and note that the bar doesn't glide smoothly anymore. Peering into the cable track, I can see big gobs of dust. Ugh. It doesn't impede my exercises but it does add a certain amount of unpleasant resistance. I'm good-to-go for all my sets until I get to the last set of Seated Cable Rows. I have to drop two reps because my lower back feels a bit odd. I feel okay for RG BB Curls, and as tired as I am (not getting even close to 8 hours sleep), I'm happy to ascend to the cardio platform. I think my anxiety is getting the best of me and I'm going to have to find alternative ways to deal with it. Clearly, exercise isn't enough.

I've wrangled a near impossible appointment with my primary care physician just to get the blood work and EKG needed by the hospital for my toe biopsy. Even though I'll only be lightly sedated and awake, they still need assurances that I'm healthy. Or healthy enough. I'm not at all happy that my local hospital just got an A rating, and the hospital I'm slated to have the procedure done at scored a C! Of course, 6 months ago, a different rating system gave my local place a C and the other place a B. It's not up to me where I go: it's where the specialist has privileges.

But what really disturbs me is the chance I might actually have subungual melanoma. People with darker skin such as Africans and Asians have a higher incidence of non-sun-related melanoma. Worst case scenario? That it's fatal. Yeah, I'm wrestling with questions about mortality and I'm only 59 and in pretty damn good health. I truly believed I'd make it into my 90s, barring being struck dead by a meteor from space.

Best case is that it's just a weird pigment thing going on since it's near my jet black flag-shaped birthmark. And then there's all the in-betweens like it's melanoma and I need to have my toe amputated. I've done the research. People get along fine without their big toes, but I'll bet it'll be stupid hard to do a pistol squat without it. Studies indicate though, that a more conservative approach  (excising the affected area) might be just as effective, although, because diagnosis is often delayed prognosis is generally poor for patients with this type of cancer. Ugh. Have I waited too long to have this biopsy done? More cause for anxiety...

While I'm on the elliptical, a regular, part of the senior coffee-klatch gabfest, gets on the stationary bike in front of me. Then he gets off and I think to myself, "I guess some folks only need five minutes to warm up." Then I look at my console and realize that I've been on the elliptical for 4 minutes and was on it before he came. So, he was on for maybe a minute? He's in seriously horrible shape with a gut that protrudes in an unhealthy, unnatural way. I'm not going to say, "Well at least he showed up" because coming to the gym doesn't count if all you do is sit around and drink coffee with your friends (who actually did exercise). 


Frigid Sunny Wednesday Pull

30 elliptical + 5cd
Program 2
Miles 2.91
Calories 327
HR 163-198 (81, 96, 80)

Cage Stretch
HGPU 25

Elbow Plank 60s
Crunches 60/60
Bicycles 60
Horizontal Scissors 60
Side Planks 2 x 60s
Bird Dogs 2 x 60s

Smith RDL
Bar (35) x 15
80 x 12
100 x 12
110 x 12

Smith RG BB Rows
80 x 25 x 3

Seated Cable Rows
70 x 12
77.5 x 12
85 x 12
90 x 12
95 x 12
100 x 10

RG BB Curls
40 lbs x 25 reps x 3 sets

20 elliptical + 5cd
Program 2
Miles 2.07
Calories 231
HR 138-203 (86, 89)

HGPU 25

Quick Mat Stretch