Wrongful Assumptions

The saline ointment made the skin around my eye greasy. Which meant that I couldn't actually tape my eye shut in the shower today because nothing would stick to my skin. Ugh. I had chosen to try the smaller waterproof bandage, and left the larger ones at home. Yes, I'd assumed that these would actually stick. Wrong! I barely had time for 15 minutes on the Recumbent Bike and another 15 on the treadmill. I cranked the incline to 10° and the speed to 3 (it increases in increments of 1/10). A quick stretch and then off to shower.

Because there's so much road construction, I wasn't actually paying attention and missed the turn off from 301 (aka Hudson River Turnpike) to Dixon Road. That meant I had to take Route 301 all the way into Fahnestock State Park to pick up the Taconic Parkway. That's not one, but three hairy exits from where I'd normally get on to the highway. Not doing that again! I got to my appointment 7 minutes late and the waiting room is full of old blind people. I guess I'm one of them now. Kidding.

My eye pressures are all over the place with the left reading an elevated 16, while the right is down a point, to 16. My left eye reads the eye chart and they pronounce me 20/20. That's the bad eye, the eye that sees faint fuzzy type in low light that my right eye can read okay. Ugh. I ask how long I have to tape my eye shut and they tell me that because they used the Femto laser, at least 3-4 weeks. Ugh. So, I can discontinue the antibiotic eye drops, but still can't risk getting bacteria in my eye just yet. I ask about exercise, and they tell me at least 4-6 weeks. I tell them I'm on the treadmill. They say, No inclines. Ugh. I tell them I'm fast walking, but not actually running. They tell me I'm trouble. They can't offer me any better tape for my eye but suggest I go to the drugstore and see about those patches for kids with lazy eye. Those have to be waterproof. Okay... I'll check that out tomorrow.

Today might see highs near 100 degrees and I want to get home to make sure our old pup is okay. I've left two fans on and the windows open. Our house is normally fairly cool due to all the surrounding foliage, but heat is not a friend to the elderly, people or pups.

The doc's office is seeing a rep about new devices tomorrow and I wonder if they'll be discussing the iStent Inject® since it can be implanted without cataract surgery. I'm not sure if I, with my tiny eyeballs and narrow angles, would actually qualify, but I'm loathe to give up my right eye natural lens. I'm a visual artist. And while corrected vision always takes preference over blindness, perfect uncorrected vision is a no-brainer. Of course, the key word is VISION.

In the waiting room, I glance at a story about faux celebrities and get annoyed by the lack of pertinent information. Mama June (of HoneyBooBoo fame) has regained 25 lbs because she's lost sight in her right eye. What?! That makes absolutely no sense. She's suffered from untreated childhood cataracts which have led to complications, and suffered a partially detached retina in the left eye. So she spends a lot of time laying down and can't exercise. Okay, I totally understand that. What I don't understand is how being blind in one eye (assuming it's not a sudden thing) makes you gain 25 lbs. Ugh. I'm constantly annoyed at the sloppy quality of articles these days, and then wonder if I apply for a remote writer's job, will I become one of these schmucks too? Double ugh.

I'm planning on going to the gym tomorrow. More super boring cardio... no inclines... Just as I'm starting to feel sorry for myself, I think, well, it can always be worse. So boring is okay. But not sure how I'm going to get my mood enhancing, depression-lifting high without a bit of exertion. Is it possible to exercise muscles without doing it strenuously? Is that even worth it? I'm going to be a sack of jelly by the end of the summer. Just in time for glaucoma treatment in the other eye...

Another Boring Monday

15 Recumbent Bike
Level 1 Manual
Calories 84
Miles 3.06

15 treadmill
Speed 3
Inclined 10%
Calories 130
Miles 0.74
Climbed 384

Sunday Musings on Glaucoma

Day 11 post-surgery

The more I read, the more questions I have. Most of the devices and procedures currently used to alleviate high IOP are for open-angle glaucoma. There are a surprising amount of glaucoma subsets that involve other diseases (such as diabetes). I have narrow-angle glaucoma, and the literature states that one has a greater disposition towards this type of glaucoma if one is Asian, and female. Ugh. Which of course makes me wonder what the standard treatments are for narrow-angle glaucoma, considering half the world's population is women, and there are billions of Asian people.

from National Taiwan University
Hospital glaucoma treatments

I narrow my search to Taiwan because 1) I'm looking for literature written in English and 2) there will be a greater likelihood of pertinent literature in an Asian country with high economic standards. So, that of course means, I'm not looking for research coming out of the People's Republic of China (because it'll probably all be in Mandarin), or Thailand (even thought they have a thriving medical tourism trade, among other types of infamous services, it's mostly cosmetic). What I find is not reassuring because there's no mention of MIGS (minimally invasive glaucoma surgery), which granted, is relatively new. There's lasering holes in the trabecular mesh work, shunt implantation, and finally, the drastic destruction (via laser) of the cells that produce eye fluid (called the ciliary body).  Nice to know what the other options are, right?

My eye looks nearly normal, with just a faint mesh of broken capillaries. I'm not sure if that's where the incisions were made to remove my lens and insert the iStent. A Femto laser was used because it is not only quicker, but more precise. Unfortunately, health insurance companies don'tsee it that way. (Seriously! They'll cover hand-made incisions but not the laser cuts!) This particular stent is meant to be positioned so that fluid drains into the normal meshwork of the eye via Schlemm's canal.

There is a new device, the mushroom-shaped iStent Inject, being tested that appears to be easier to install, and can implant multiple stents which, theoretically, will lead to a greater lowering of IOP. I could use that in my right eye since it has maintained a 3-4 point increase over the past year. While not at a critical level, it is alarming that having had laser iridotomy (first line of treatment for narrow-angle glaucoma after eye drops), and SLTs twice on both eyes, my eye pressures have never dropped to the "safe" level of <10 mmHg (millimeters of mercury). Last week my left eye measured 14, the same as it was prior to surgery, and my right eye maintained a pressure of 17.

There are more drastic devices that would lead to greater reduction in pressure, but those shunts also require blebs, or pockets under the surface of the sclera that can clog, become infected and suffer other serious malfunctions. I'm convinced that implanting a shunt will totally kill my gym rat days. That is unacceptable for me. It's not just vanity, but sanity that's at stake. If I can't work out, I really think that my mental health as well as physical well-being will suffer. Exercise is more than just stress-relief. It's also a mood enhancer, with the added benefit of preserving mental acuity. I can't give it up.

new iStent Inject

I seem to see just as well out of my left eye as my right, so that's reassuring and makes me less nervous about replacing my natural lens with an artificial one. I don't think my doctor has used the newer iStent Inject yet. It might be worth waiting for, depending on how the right eye progresses or maintains. According to a glaucoma specialist at Wills Eye Hospital in Philadelphia, this device is being tested in Armenia. (Admittedly, that's not a place I would expect to see in an article about new devices.) I see my doc tomorrow. Wednesday will be two weeks and I can stop using the antibiotic eye drops, which suggests (to me, but I'll double check) that I'll be able to shower without having to tape my eye shut. That will be such a relief!

I've added another treatment, as per my doc's instruction sheet: it's an OTC saline ointment (Muro 128) applied twice a day. It's suppose to reduce edemas, although I'm not sure I have any... and because it's basically salt in a greasy format, it stings a bit, makes my vision blurry and tends to goo up my lashes. It's also ridiculously expensive. I bought the store brand version, and it was still $22 for a tiny tube. (The cashier told me that they stopped carrying the name brand item because it was so pricey!) Luckily I had some coupons to knock the price down $5. But still! Ugh. And no matter what stent I have implanted in my right eye, I'll probably still have to do this routine again...

Day 12 post eye drops and goo

Cardio Cure for the Blahs

Having 6 different eye drops to administer requires time management and organizational skills that start to lapse as the day wears on. I went to bed much too late last night. Consequently, I had a dull headache this morning and found myself to be less than enthusiastic about hitting the gym. Plus, it was downright cold at 50F (I packed a flannel shirt to change into once I was done).

My eye looks loads better, with just a fraction of redness. But it still aches a bit and itches after I do my drops. Worse, it's difficult to clean all the sleepies out of your face if you can't splash water on it. The clear eye shield leaves edge indents on my skin no matter how lightly I tape it to my face. I'll be glad when I don't have to do this every night.

I'm tired and depressed when I get to the gym. I'm wearing a different green shirt though. As I pedal the recumbent bike, I can feel my mood lifting. I'm trying to pedal as fast as I can without exerting myself. I even manage to get warm enough to unzip my hoodie. On the treadmill, I decide to increase the speed and level angle until I'm just at the edge of being breathless. I'm definitely busting a sweat now, but it feels good and makes me happy. I'm light and bouncy, and mouth all the lyrics to my iPod tunes. With the body of the machine angled up 12° I'm able to comfortably grab the end of the handles (heart rate sensors) for a few minutes. That's just enough time for the machine to register it. My hands will fall asleep being raised to face height for extended lengths of time!

White orb on lower right is glare
from the overhead lights!

Under normal circumstances I would stretch and do a bunch of pull ups and then push ups. But I can't just yet. It's been 10 days and I'm not suppose to exert myself for at least two weeks and maybe longer. Ugh. I can't resist stretching in the Cage, but at one point I forget my caution and pull myself up slightly while inside. Knots in my upper back and shoulders feel better when stretched out with a bit of body weight. But I instantly regret my foray because my eyeballs ache a little. It could just be the "lack of sleep" headache I woke up with, or it could be eyeball pressures. I don't know and I really shouldn't be risking a great outcome for this surgery by doing something stupid, like pull ups. Ugh.

I get on the Step Mill for 10 minutes and only go to Level 3. I'm so used to doing the fast-paced Level 6 that I almost don't know what to do with myself. But climbing stairs will definitely raise your heart rate! I see mine shoot from 125 to 140. And I'm warm enough to be sweaty. I get off the Step Mill and do a few leg and hip stretches, then a few shoulder rotations. For each move,  I have to assess whether there's a face-down component. Bending down increases optic pressures so my stretches are extremely limited. But still, better than nothing.

In the locker room, I tape my eye shut, but I'm still not happy with my fear of shower water infiltrating my closed eye. I also need to spend time exfoliating since having icthylosis vulgaris means going more than a week becomes unpleasant and somewhat embarrassing, with all the dry flaky scaly skin not quite peeling off... there's only so much that an alpha-hydroxy cream like Amlactin® will cure with a mere application. (When I get to the grocery store, I buy a few waterproof band-aids to see if those will work better in the future.) I hold my breath when I get on the gym scale. Inexplicably, it reads 109.0 lbs. So weird and unexpected since I'm eating normally. All I can think is that I'm losing all my muscles and getting fat, because I weigh less but my clothes fit the same. Ugh!

I have a follow-up appointment with my glaucoma doc on Monday. My vision has returned to normal in the operated eye. But I wonder about my eye drops, because the antibiotic label says it's a 2.5 mL bottle and I can refill 2.5 times. What? Is the pharmacist going to dispense a half bottle? The accompanying anti-inflammatory is in a 5 mL bottle and I can refill it 5 times. I need to administer both these medications 1 drop 4 times a day. This is a bit baffling. Ugh.

I'm not ready to do my right eye. Not yet. I'm still sporadically queasy and my eye itches like I've got allergies. Sometimes it waters for no apparent reason. Weirder still, when I viewed the treadmill screen today, the left eye gave me a normal image, but the right eye had bizarre glare distortions. I'll have to mention this to my doc 'cuz it's definitely weird.


Bored Out of My Mind Friday Workout

15 min recumbent bike + 3 cd
Level 1 Manual
Calories 81
Miles 2.78

30 min treadmill
Speed 2.9
Incline 10 – 12%
Calories 246
Miles 1.33
731 ft climbed
Average Heart Rate 128

Cage Stretch (uh oh!)

10 min StepMill
Level 3
Steps 356
Floors 22
Calories 56
Average Heart Rate 140

Day 9 and I Feel Okay

My eye still itches and aches a bit when I administer medicinal drops, but it's less red and almost looks normal. Both my forearm and face are still sore though, especially the outer edge of my eye socket where the anesthesia was injected twice and vigorously massaged into the surrounding tissue. My skin has enough freckles and other discolorations so as not to make the bruising all that noticeable, which I guess is a good thing.

I did a bunch of errands today, including buy a new cheap dog bed so I could hose off the stinky one by the front door. My old pup leaks a bit when he naps even though he's on a twice daily dose of Proin®. Lately he's been a lot stinkier and wiping him down with paper towels and spray-on waterless dog cleaner barely helps. I bought some mango-scented dog wipes today just to help with odor control. I can't imagine he doesn't know he's stinky since he still has a fairly decent sense of smell. A woman in line behind me at the store asked if I'd considered doggy diapers. Her old lab developed such incontinence that he'd poop himself while laying down. Mine hasn't gotten that bad yet, but he's definitely stumbling more. The muscle weakness is progressing. At least his appetite is still good!

I also went to Kmart to look for bigger sport pants for my son. He's too tall for the boys XL, but there's barely anything in the Sm sizes for teens and men. Kmart seems to cater to the XXLs! I wander by the Clearance rack and spy a bunch of sports bras on sale for $7.99. That's cheaper than buying at Marshalls! I select several in the L and XL sizes, and see a cute navy dress with tiny red stars. I wear a S in dresses. In the dressing room, I discover that the dress has an internal shelf bra. Uh oh... the dress is simultaneously too big with gaping arm holes, and too tight because of the shelf bra elastic. Oddly, there's also no support from the shelf bra at all. Not buying that!

The sports bras fit okay, with one making me look positively busty. I find that hilarious as a triple A! And of course, I'm never going to wear these sports bras without a tank or shirt over them so I put my long-sleeve T on just to make sure everything looks okay. Done! I'm thinking about adding a few minutes of Step Mill to my boring cardio workout tomorrow...

I did stay up too late reading up on the latest micro-stents used in glaucoma surgery. The first on the list is the one I currently have implanted in my left eye, the Glaukos iStent. There's discussion of inserting multiple stents simultaneously to more effectively reduce eye pressures. All the studies cited compare plain cataract surgery with cataract surgery including stent implantation. There's no mention of installing stents without cataract surgery! I have more research to do...

Songs That Have Kept Me Sane

The reports of celebrity suicides and unconscionable murders has me bewildered. I decided to list a few of the songs that I'm especially touched by... Music has always been very important to me, ever since I discovered Simon & Garfunkel's Wednesday Morning 3 AM. Sadly, I'm only able to embed 4 videos on this page (when I add more they disappear off the page), and a YouTube link to the aforementioned album.

(The right music playlist downright powers an awesome gym workout. But all you fellow gym rats already know that!)


David Bowie: Rock 'n Roll Suicide
This song kept me sane during my college years... although I'm sure I made my roommates crazy.



R.E.M.: Everybody Hurts



Imagine Dragons: Demons



The Wallflowers: Baby Bird (they don't seem to have an official video and the "in concert" ones have absolutely horrendous sound quality)

Lazy Ass Workout

My son and I went to see Dead Pool 2 yesterday. There were only 8 other people in our theater, and I was the only one without a Y chromosome. That didn't keep me from laughing aloud throughout the movie, although the opening credit scene from the original DP is still the best, most awesome I've ever seen. I've embedded it here for those of you who haven't yet watched this 2016 flick...


Afterwards, we went home so my son could change into his kung fu uniform and he went to his sword form class. Today he had his Science final and was home by 10:45 am. I had my annual NYS safety inspection and sat at the repair shop for a good 45 minutes. Luckily, there was a very pleasant older woman also waiting, and we had a nice chat. I'm perfectly friendly on a one-on-one basis; it's crowds that I don't deal with. Maybe because I'm short and constantly in fear of being elbowed in the face.

Or maybe it's because I'm a "highly sensitive person." I took Dr Elaine Aaron's online test and scored within range, but of course, on different days I tend to answer differently. One of her blog posts discusses the Extroverted Introvert, and I am reminded how my mother once described me to my grade school teachers as just that: an extroverted introvert. This might explain the anxiety and acute awareness of I have of myself, and my situations. Yes, I'm the sensitive artsy type. And a gym rat. Hmmm... gym rats are probably not usually highly sensitive people. Unless they're plugged in and can avoid the bright lights, and constant din. Or go at non-peak times. Like I do.

My eye is still tender. I know this because I dabbed it a bit too hard and boy did that hurt. When you need to apply 6 different eye drops throughout the day, you either have goop running down your face and sticky lashes, or you need to gently blot your face and eyelid. My forearm is still bruised and tender as well. I would've thought that after an entire week, it'd all be healed up. But apparently not. That bruise is in the "purple goes to green-yellow" phase. I used a different tape in the shower today. It was stickier, but I'm still nervous about getting shower water in my eye.

Today, I do the same routine as Monday, but step it up a tad. I adjust the incline until it hits 10%. It goes as high as 30% (but that stressed my ankles and gave me shin splints the last time I tried). I also increase the pace to 2.5, although I'm not quite sure exactly what that number means. I click on the TV icon on the machine's dashboard, but again, I'm not tall enough to actually see most of it because of the overhead glare. Good thing I really like my tunes! Because BOREDOM. I'm even wearing the same clothes! At least today, I got a tad warm and almost broke a sweat (but didn't). Still, I tossed my gym clothes in the wash when I got home.

The gym scale reads 109.4 lbs, which is double weird because not only did I stuff myself at dinner (cheese raviolis with jarred marinara sauce, frozen peas and chicken sausages), I also had a sizeable lunch (toast, scrambled eggs and raw garlic). And that doesn't count the ziplock bag of Raisinets® and Reeces Pieces® that my son and I shared at the movies. It's going to catch up with me. And I hope I'm able to return to full workouts before then! Yes, I miss doing pull ups and push ups and planks. I miss being active, and this sort of workout doesn't really count. Ugh.


Boring Wednesday Workout

15 min recumbent bike + 3 cool down
Level 1 Manual program
Calories 81
Miles 2.85

30 min treadmill
Speed 2.0, 2.5
Incline 5%, 10% 518 ft climbed
Miles 1.20
Calories 199

Didn't Even Break A Sweat

I ate a lot of cheese over the weekend, mostly because we went to a farm open house and they sell a lot of different types of cheese. I was a tad disappointed that with the large herd of goats on the property, I didn't see any goat cheese for sale. Everything was cow cheese, some pasteurized and some raw. There was also ice cream with the high fat content, which gave it great mouth-feel, but you really couldn't eat too much without feeling a little queasy. Of course, I've been feeling queasy on and off since my glaucoma surgery.

At first I thought it was because my sinuses and eustachian tubes were messed up from having to lie flat for so many hours during surgery. Post-nasal drip is only aggravated by such conditions! And then my hubs thought my upset stomach was due to hunger. I tend not to eat when my tummy's upset. And I do feel a tad better when I eat, but it doesn't last. I've come to realize that one or more of the many eye drops I need to take is the culprit. There are at least two I dispense four times daily: an antibiotic and an anti-inflammatory. And although these medications are administered to the eye, there's no such thing as a closed system, so eventually I've ingested some of it as it drains down the back of my throat. Oh well... At least I think my eye is healing nicely. And I can see decently out of it, although in certain conditions, the blurriness really annoys me. I can read my computer screen with the artificial lens, but it's a bit disturbing to notice that tilting my head changes how well I can focus. That doesn't happen with my natural lens!

The treadmills at Gold's Gym on the Cardio Platform

I need a shower, and today's the first day of my "non-strenuous workout"... some time pedaling the recumbent bicycle, and then walking on the treadmill. I stretch a little at the Stretch Cage, but no pull ups, or push ups. I'm not suppose to bend over or down because that will increase pressure in my head and eyes. I don't want my seams to pop open! Because I know I'm probably not going to bust a sweat (and I don't), I put on a t-shirt. If I can't get really warm, I might be cold! I have my hoodie as well, but mostly to keep tissues and my iPod in the pockets because my gym clothes don't have pockets. I keep myself from getting too bored by singing to myself with my tunes turned up loud as I walk. I'm almost dancing, but not running. Bad knees don't run. I was able to watch some TV on the recumbent bike, but the treadmill is for people so much taller than I am that I am unable to see the screen because of the glare! And I put my hands at the base of the handles. The heart rate sensors are at the end of the handles which don't adjust down, and I'm not walking with my hands in the air over my head. That's just stupid. If I adjust the treadmill itself to the max 30° tilt, I get shin splints. So, I'm not doing that either. Like I've said before, I don't fit into a lot of the equipment.

Day 5 post surgery

I'm not even going to wash today's gym clothes! I can wear them again on Wednesday. My arm still looks awful from the IV bruising, and my face is still tender around my eye socket. I tape my eyelid close with two strips after I get the shower running and have everything set up. I feel more confident with my shower plans today. But I shouldn't've. Because in the shower, I feel a bit of water under the tape and I shouldn't! WTH?! I'm not sure what failed but after I wash my hair with my eyes shut tight, I clip my hair up and quickly finish soaping and showering. I only find one piece of tape on my face, and I don't know where the other strip went. It's not in the shower, not on my towels. Eventually, I realize that it's stuck to my collarbone. WTH?! Ugh. I may have to resort to different tape next time! Something a bit stickier, but not impossible to remove from my eyebrow and lashes! Ugh.

Tomorrow I'm skipping the gym and taking my son to see Dead Pool 2. He has half days for the rest of the week due to finals and will be home by 11 am. And it's $5 Tuesdays at the local theater. I'm not quite sure why half the school must leave when the other half is taking exams, but again, I'm not sure why school lets out before the end of the month, and the last three days are again half days, or as we all call them "no learning days." Ugh.

If profanity bothers you, you should absolutely not watch the trailer below...



Monday

15 min Recumbent Bike + 3 min cool down
Level 1
Miles 1.82
Calories 71

30 min TrueFitness treadmill
Speed 1.0 - 2.0
Miles 0.92
Calories 86