Listening to the Voice in Your Head

It's much easier for me to admit that I suffer from anxiety than to say I'm also a depressive sort. I'm not the type to spend my day under the covers although the coronavirus stay-at-home order hasn't helped. Everyone whose routine has been severely disrupted (some folks are still working regularly, or even more than usual) has been tempted to binge-watch streaming media and fill up on comfort foods. Drinking more than usual? Pants getting a little tight? Me too! I haven't worked out for almost two weeks and I can't entirely blame the soggy weather. I just haven't felt like doing much of anything and that's probably a symptom of depression. Exercise helps. Especially vigorous exercise. I really miss my gym.

This past weekend, we finally fixed the puddle in front of the garage door with several bags of crushed bluestone gravel. It took three days to get it from Home Depot because the first day we went, the store wasn't allowing customers inside unless they were there to pick up an order. Ugh.

We went home and placed an order for the only gravel listed as available online and instore: garden pea gravel. Then we waited all the next day for an email or text from the store. Which never came. So on the third day, we drove to the store with our order number. No one was waiting in line outside. The service rep, who wore her mask under her nose (rendering it fairly ineffective for her own protection), checked the system and said our order was still being filled. The website had listed 191 bags in stock. She told us we could get the gravel ourselves and then she'd close the order.

The outdoor Garden Center didn't actually have the pea gravel. Or any gravel, except for bags of crushed bluestone. There were bags of rounded river rocks but we decided those would be too big to walk on comfortably. The cashier never checked that we had the right materials or the correct number of bags. I think the pea gravel might've been a few cents more expensive but it wasn't worth the hassle of voiding the order and having to stand in another line just to check out.

Now I really have no excuse not to use the garage gym. While today is decidedly cooler than the peak 79F a few days ago, it's sunny and pleasant outside. I put on gym clothes and sneakers and trudge out to the garage. The little voice in my head whines about how much cardio sucks. And it does. I have to pause twice because something is stabbing me in the foot. Something small that wasn't there when I walked across the yard. I go from cold to warm in ten minutes, and then my fingers throb as if I've walked into a sauna from the Arctic. Not all my fingers; just the last three on my right hand. My right foot isn't happy either, feeling the pressure of each pedal motion on the bony metatarsals. The left foot is fine, so it's not the sneakers. It's me.

Today, I give in to the voice that says, "I hate cardio and I don't want to do it for 35 minutes." Instead, I do it for 20 minutes and tell myself I can do "just cardio" tomorrow. But I'm going to finish the rest of my routine. Immediately, I feel much better. Because I'm so much happier doing anything other than cardio. I even add Side Planks back in because I'm wearing the NB sneakers instead of the super-soft and comfy but ultimately non-supportive Skechers. (Probably another reason my feet hurt.)

After the routine core/ab exercises, pushups and pullups, I fish out the bar my husband bought to affix to the Power Straps. It clips to the straps in a fixed width, making it easier to do Inverted Rows. Without the bar, you're forced to use a neutral grip. With the bar, you can use an overhand or underhand grip, much as you'd use on a Smith machine, or your kitchen table. I don't have the best form but still better than nothing.

The 15 lb DBs are useful for doing SuperSets of Presses, Front Raises and Lateral Raises. I haven't figured out the adjustable square DB system that my husband bought years ago. Those make perfect footrests though when I need to stabilize myself on the bench. It's such an old bench that neither of us can figure out what exactly the angled upper portion is for since there's no way to secure it in position.

My husband bought a box (assembly required) to do his new workout routines. The box has three different heights depending on which way you turn it. However, even at its shortest height of 16" it's still too tall for me to use for Split Squats. The plastic tote I've been using measures a full inch shorter. I have some trouble with the Split Squats because the hammertoes on my right foot don't really allow me to place the top of my foot flat on the lid which leads to a bit of instability in the movement.

I drag portions of the two square DBs over to the bench. They are the perfect height to plant my feet on while I do Rip Skulls. After some curls with the EZ bar, I stretch and call it done. Now let's see if I can get myself out of the house tomorrow for just cardio...

Tuesday Workout

Vision elliptical

Program: manual

20 min

Miles: 1.76

Calories: 161

HR 74-138

Crunches 60/60

Elbow Plank 60s

Bench Knee-Ins 50

Bicycles 60

Bird Dogs 2 x 60s

Side Planks 2 x 60s

Pushups 25

HGPU 17

Bodyweight squats 25

Strap Inverted Row w/ bar overhand 12, 15

DB SuperSet x 3 sets

  Press x 25

  Alt Front Raises x 12

  Lateral Raises x 12

Split Squat 12 each leg

EZ Bar Rip Skulls 30 lbs x 12 x 3

EZ Bar BB Curl 30lbs x 25

EZ Bar RG Curl 30 x 25

Quick stretch